From Why to How

from why to how

This post was written by Jenny Jerkins. You can read more from Jenny on her blog here.

I sat in an open room surrounded by thirty other patients sitting reclined in their chairs, all with IV lines hooked up to ports in their chests. They were there just like my mom, receiving their four hours of chemotherapy treatment. The weight of the magnitude of people battling the beast of cancer came crashing down on me, and I found it hard to breathe. This is one office, in one city. There are thirty patients twice a day. Multiply that by at least four days a week—that’s close to 250 patients in one week’s time, in a single office. I fought tears, and I felt the lump rise in my throat. I couldn’t speak. I felt paralyzed by the amount of pain and fear that surrounded me.

God, why? That’s what I normally would’ve found myself asking. But instead, I found myself asking God, how?

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve already asked God “why?” endless times as we faced my mom’s diagnosis of breast cancer. But as I sat in that room, I realized I may never know all the answers to those why questions. I can only know how I can be used for His glory. I can allow Him to use me, because of my circumstances, to “go there” and meet the needs of hurting people right where I am; I don’t even have to go looking for them.

from why to how

“Perhaps you were created for such a time as this.” – Esther 4:14

 It was a strong realization that maybe this isn’t my season to take that international mission trip with other bloggers that I really wanted to go on. But it is my season to meet the needs of those hurting and lost right here around me. He can use this battle my mom is facing to allow me to give hope and encouragement to others who are also battling for life.

I’m not really sure what that looks like just yet. I think that’s where we all get stuck. We realize God can use us right where we are, but we fail to take the next step and “go there.” I know I’ve had so many missed opportunities because I fear rejection. But I don’t want this to be one of them. He created me for this very moment, for a purpose. I may not like the reason I’m here, but I can allow God to use it for His glory.

I want to meet each of these people around me, face-to-face, and let them know there is a hope beyond a physical cure on this earth. Maybe they know that already. But maybe they need encouragement or just someone to tell them they are being prayed for. I can provide snacks for those waiting and receiving treatment, I can write cards of encouragement to give each one of them, or give just a simple smile. It truly only takes small acts of kindness to “go there” and show others the love of Christ. All we have to do is pay attention to those around us, and He will show us how.

  • Where has God placed you that you might “go there” in the midst of it all?
  • Will you ask Him why you’re there or will you choose to ask Him how He wants to use you in the midst of it?

jenny nenkins